The Greatest Rebellion

"Creativity is the greatest rebellion in existence." -Osho

This quote first caught my eye on social media after the presidential inauguration. I paused upon reading it, yet didn’t understand how anyone could focus on… anything, let alone something as centered as art.  Yet, when I came up for air last week, I realized that’s exactly how I made it through the first months of this presidency.

First though, let’s start with my realization that mohawks take a lot of work. Or, at least, my undercut took a lot of work.  Thus, it brought to my attention that my previous desire for an outward showing of rebellion was outside of the parameters of my low-maintenance lifestyle. My rebellion to beauty culture has always been the fact that I only cut my hair once a year and I resonate with this more than the knowledge that I still very much want to shave my head.  [[ Le sigh ]].

Over the past several months since my last entry, I've written several essays that I’ve decided not to post. In these turbulent times, I just couldn’t find the same courage for public vulnerability.  Also, how could I possibly write anything that could distract my community from fighting against the atrocities of our government?  People in my community have lost jobs, my company has stopped funding our Pride and Women’s groups, my favorite spaces are closing and the crews that protect/maintain them have been cut or canceled.  Outside of my circle, I’ve been watching women’s sports be defunded while claims are made of “protection” by attacking trans women.  As I look further and further out of my community, I see more and more hateful and disheartening acts.  With a heavy heart, I buried myself in work for the past several months, knowing that I need to stock the coffers. We are only in year 1 of 4 and I have no doubt things can (and will) be more grim as things progress.

When I wasn’t working, I was running, sewing, and… lifting weights (something I haven’t talked about yet, but will someday).  Given that this cold/snowy/wet/dark/WINTER running feels like an old romance that has lost the spark. I move forward out of duty and ritual, nothing more.  Running now is paying down pain that I’ve scheduled for the summer and summer is the time that I know, sure as the meadowie meadows will lose their snow, that I will fall back in love with running long mountain days.

My sewing project journal

Although I mentioned a return to sewing, in my last post, I’m not actually sure that I painted the full picture of my current compulsion.  It’s like a freakin assembly line over here!  Whereas I used to burn the good fabric on my first attempt at a pattern (who has time to make things twice!?!!), now I prep with second string fabric. I wear those new pieces for days before making final notes on fitment for the real deal production piece.  I spend my Sunday mornings online, trolling for vintage blankets, quilts, and table cloths.  I made a sewing-specific IG account and follow my favorite makers and designers with abandon. I’ve finally learned to use a double needle to finish hems, I’ve developed a preference for a method of sewing waistbands, and I’ve sharpened my tailors chalk more this year than in my entire life.  It was just this morning that it hit me. I am centering. I am centered. I am creating.  Creating is rebellion. Sewing is a Mohawk!!!

Ture Bias, Emerson Sort & Ogden Cami Set

Another day, I will dive into pattern reviews and more of the details behind my elevated compulsion for sewing - today was just about reentry into the blogosphere. Happy rebellion, friends. There is no time like the present to remember how to exercise your incognito middle finger.