Finite Time

For the first several days away from work during the plant shutdown that I mentioned in my last post, I successfully turned my brain off and lost myself in devotion to my home.  As the weeks progressed though, I started to feel my frustration with the slow, deliberate path I had chosen for both of projects I was working.  If I had purchased Ikea cabinets, It would’ve taken a single day to build, modify, and instal said cabinets.  Instead, I built cabinets out of plywood that will not only stand up to the wear and tear of a gear-centric mudroom, but that will outlive me.  It would’ve taken a day to instal a standard shower pan/insert.  Instead, I built a custom wood structure and hand-tiled the walls with small subway tiles, requiring HOURS on HOURS of meticulous placement... all for a dog shower.  This is where my value for slow living and my greatest weakness,  a lack of patience, clash.  Again, I value the lovingly, hand-crafted nature of this home, but is this “it”.  Is this what I want for this life?

[Building a plywood cabinet from scratch... for the first time. Doors still pending.]

This restlessness with momentum down a chosen path versus the endless possibilities of life led me to a Rich Roll's podcast episode with Oliver Burkeman.  Although it wasn’t mind blowing, this podcast resonated deeply within me, leading me to also listen to Oliver Burkman’s book, 4000 Weeks, while I worked.  Listening while working always puts me in a position of not taking solid notes, so only taking away concepts.  Here they are:

• The average person will have approximately 4000 weeks in their life.  Only 4000.  

• It is a finite period of time and rather than dithering on what to do with that life, it is best to simply choose and devote yourself to those choices.

• The kicker is to assure you are devoting yourself to the right choices that matter most to you, not frittering away that finite amount of time on what doesn’t matter.

Further refined:

1. Time is finite.

2. Define your values.

3. Make choices based on those values.

4. Devote yourself to your choices.

5. Make sacrifices elsewhere.

In my early 30’s, I exploded my life, shedding all expectations (and losing all career momentum) to use a coming-of-age type of experience to redefine my values.  A core an unchanging value for me is to explore this world in a very physical way.  This means both nurturing my physical ability with the goal of lifelong fitness and tailoring activities for my aging body.  

[Racing triathlon, to thru hiking the PCT to racing ultra marathons, long weekends with my best pup, and trail crew. This life was the sweet spot.]

This year, I took my impossibly long wishlist for exploration and, using the guide of my finite time in this world and finite probability of significant fitness & durability, I made a list of 15 things to do before 60.  That means I have less than 17 years to complete just 15 activities.  No, I don’t plan on stopping at 60 but used that age as a boundary for the most physical goals vs those that with a longer shelf life.  Also, looking at my list…. I have no idea how to accomplish all of these things in completion while working.  That problem, redefining my work goals is the first problem I get to solve. Because... at the end of the day, I need to find more time.